Seeing this quote made me think about a lot of things but especially where my life is heading.
Lately i have been thinking more and more about what is passing me by, and may have already passed. These thoughts may be getting heavier more so as i look my 30Th birthday in the face (tomorrow). I'm a firm believer of "live by knife, die by the knife" so by no means am i crying wolf or looking for some sort of sympathy. The decisions I've made have been on my own and i am the one that will live with them.
I've always felt that i was doing what i do just for the pay, but it doesn't pay good! It may be interesting and there is nothing to be ashamed of in a hard days work but what is the final outcome/benefit (I've ruled out pay)? More and more these days I've seem to accept where i am in life as the past, present and future. But for the past week I've seen sign's that i don't i want to accept that.
My struggle has seemed to inspire me to try to move on. It has been on my mind for a while but now more than ever i want to act and pursue my hope's and dream's. I don't want to look back on my life one day and be " What if?" or " I should have".
I feel i owe it to myself to at least make an effort. Sure it wont be easy and I'm sure ill wanna give up like i have before but.... i gotta do this. My life was meant to be so much more than what it has been.
I want to enjoy my life, what i do for a living and where it takes me. Not be old and bitter with nothing to show for a life of being miserable. As for being scared of failure who wouldn't be. Hopefully this will be the start of something not just me blowing smoke up my own ASS!!!
